Online Diary
Diary of what happend this week…
Sunday
The schedule for our revalida was posted on the last day of our preboard.. I had mixed emotions the moment i heard about the news.. First, I was so surprised that revalida is just few days after our preboard. I was thinking that it would be a week after coz i wasn’t keeping track on the schedule of activities for this month.. Second, Master (Risos) told me that I belong to team B and someone said "Malas kaayo ka moki kay naa ka sa team B.. Lisod ra ba kay ang mga panelist kay mga daku2x na mga CI, sila mdm Gigante, mdm Sisno, mdm Saldivia unya naa pa jud si ms Benabay.." She laughed.. I just replied, "Ok ra na oi! Mas nindot nuon na kay ma challenge pa ko.. mas naa na koy gana mu tuon.." Third, I felt worried coz I’m not prepared to take the test.. I wasn’t even prepared when I took the preboard exams coz I really didn’t study..
Indeed I was challenged.. Challenged to the fact that I have great panelists to deal with.. So I planned my activities for this week so that I can find time to open and read my book (reviewer), which I haven’t done since the day I borrowed it from my aunt.. I was so determined for the revalida, but there are certain things you can’t control that would interfere with your plans just like our case study which was due on wednesday.. So I planned to make the case study before reading the book.. I didn’t expect that there are a lot of corrections to be made for the second draft.. I was so confident coz Joanne (my partner for the case study) said that she sent me a copy of our case study which she edited.. I thought that all I have to do is to make little adjustments with it.. After downloading the file and reading its contents, much to my surprise when I noticed that she just edited the very SIMPLE corrections.. She even copied from another source but it’s no use because it was way out from our case study.. So i spent 2 "sleepless" nights(monday and tuesday) for making that case study.. My point here is I wasted 2 days which I supposed to utilize for studying.. So I have a day left (wed) to start studying..
Wed
Unfortunately, I’m the one who will pass our case study to the CI assigned coz I was the one who printed it… I went to school at about 3 in the afternoon… Unluckily, the CI already left the campus.. so I waited for 2 more hours to attend our sign language class.. While waiting, my friend forced me to play DOTA.. what else can I do but accept the invitation.. I don’t have a book to read anyway..
After our class, I still played DOTA coz I was so confident that I will be able to finish reading the topics in just one night.. I said to myself, "kaya ra lagi ni kay reviewer ra ako basahon.." I arrived home at about 9.. and started studying.. To tell you honestly, it was the first time that I was so determined to study.. I started reading Psych coz it was the first topic discussed in the book.. Time passed by and it was already 12:30!!! i started reading the book at about 9 pm then 3 hours later I’m still stuck with Psych.. First time I really felt that I’m in deep trouble and said to myself, "Ugma na lang ko tiwas oi.. Kaya ra lagi ni…"
Thursday
I woke up at about 8am.. Went to the CR bringing my book and together with the sense of a little panic before taking a bath.. I tried to read faster while sitting on the toilet bowl but I noticed that I was not able to retain much of the things I’ve read.. So I decided to go back again and try to read it with the pace I am used to when studying.. After reading for about 10 mins, I took a bath, eat and went to school.. I arrived at about 10:30.
I saw Fides and Mia in the nursing lobby and went together with them.. They said that they will go to Milk to meet their friends (Eda,Dairene,Mark,etc…) So I accompanied them there and decided not to go inside and told them that I have something to do. But actually, the reason why I didn’t go inside was that I am sure that I can’t continue reading the book.. So I went to the library and studied.. I was all alone in one table.. perfect setting to study and concentrate.. katz and martz was also in the lib.. They told me that the revalida was so difficult and they have to do some readings.. Thanks guys!! you just added the amount of anxiety/panic I’m feeling that time.. Panic level went from 30% to about 50%.. I had no choice but to scan the pages in the reviewer so that I could tackle more topics.. I’m not concerned anymore with the amount of things I retain from reading.. All I’m concerned that time was I would be able to familiarize some concepts found in the book.. From psych, I shifted to MedSurg.. Moments later, I fell asleep.. Good thing Katz woke me up.. Then, I slowly closed the book, placed it inside my bag and said "Pataya nako ani! Wa na jud ni.. hagbong na jud ko unya.. :c" I left the lib at around 12 to take my lunch… while going downstairs, I met my classmates… They were discussing so many things that they have reviewed for revalida.. Now my panic level rises even higher.. Instead of going out to take my lunch, I sat down and opened my book.. I found myself reading again.. Cramming.. then suddenly, thoughts came into my mind that it’s better to stop reading coz it’s just no use.. Nothing is retained in my mind/memory.. My mind will not work when it’s not in its good condition.. I just started to distract people, telling them to stop studying or just annoying them to make them stop.. Wahahahahha!! (NANGAMONG RA KO!!! sori sa na-amung!!! Peace!!!).. I went upstairs at about 1PM.. took a seat in the corridor and started to read again..
‘Libog au ko noh? Magtuon unya dili.. then magtuon na sad balik..’
Moments later, while reading, I paused for a moment and said a little prayer.. Little but with a very big favor asking for God’s guidance or help.. (I miss the time when I pause for a while and pray for someone or something.. Last time I did this was 2nd yr college after i joined the BLD Youth Encounter..) I asked Him to send down His Holy Spirit to help me during the revalida.. I also told Him that for whatever results I’m gonna have after the revalida, I will accept it fairly coz I really didn’t do my part.. Since I was a child, I really believe in this saying — DO YOUR BEST AND GOD WILL DO THE REST.. I told Him that "ok ra Lord kung mahagbong ko kay wla man jud ko nag tuon ug tarong pero Lord mas ok kung maka pasar lang ko.. Maayo unta na ang mga questions na mugawas kay kanang na tun-an nko.." Baga kaayo kog nawng noh? hehehe 
During the revalida, I was in trouble when I read the word diphtheria.. Imagine, 4th year na lang ko wla gyapon ko kahibaw unsay diphtheria!! poor me!! next word i was concerned of was magnesium toxicity.. lols!! I wasn’t able to read this topic… To summarize it all, I tried my best in answering all of the questions.. I’m happy that the CI’s gave clues for the answers coz without those clues, I’m sure I will be for re-revalida… Thanks great panelists (mdm sisno, gigante, saldivia. ybañez, ms go, ang and benabay) for helping me out… I owe one to you!!
God really answered my prayer.. I really owe HIM a lot… I don’t know how He did it but I’m sure He helped me pass the revalida.. I know I was not alone when I was answering the questions.. He may be in the souls of the CIs who were enlightened to give me clues and consider my answers.. Hehehe
Thank you very much for answering my little prayer…
